Dads and Doulas: Working Together
Many dads-to-be worry that a doula will replace them at the birth. A father may worry that his partner doesn’t trust him enough to be a support for her during labor. He may also be concerned that a doula’s presence at the birth will remove the intimacy of the moment.
But a doula can never replace the father’s role, which is to be there to love and support his partner. Plus, he also experiences the birth of the child, in his own way. As far as the doula interfering with the intimacy of the moment, the doula is only one member of the birth team, which includes nurses, a doctor or midwife, and sometimes other specialists. In fact, a doula can often help create that intimate feel by helping shoo the nurses or doctors out of the room for a moment, so the about-to-be-new-parents can be alone for awhile.
A doula is there to help the father, as much as she helps the mother. The fact of the matter is, our society places a great deal of pressure and responsibility on the father-to-be during labor. A childbirth class isn’t enough to prepare a new, nervous dad to support his wife through what may be one of the most difficult and challenging moments in her life. Is it fair to expect the father to remain 100% focused and calm, when his wife is struggling?
A doula can help support the father, so he can concentrate on his wife. Here are some of the many ways dads and doulas work together.
Behind the Scenes Birth Coach
For the father who wants to really be active and provide all the physical and emotional support, the doula can help with hints, reminders, and advice during the birth, so he can just focus on his wife.
Is the mother having back labor? The father may not recognize this, or even know what to do. But the doula is trained to figure out what’s bothering the mother the most, and all the possible ways to help her feel more comfortable. The doula can tell the dad what she thinks would help his wife best, while he does the actual work and support.
The doula can also bring drinks and snacks to the father, so he can keep up his energy during the long labor. She can take the time to speak with nurses or seek out extra pillows, allowing the father to stay with his wife without interruption.
Tag-team Birth Support
Most labors last several hours, sometimes lasting 12 hours and longer. A doula’s presence allows the father to take guilt free breaks. He can go get a bite to eat, or take a nap, without feeling that he left his wife alone.
Whether he needs to take just a few breaks during labor, or he prefers to switch every hour with the doula to keep his energy up, it will allow the mother to feel supported and cared for continuously.
Chance to Just Experience the Birth
As mentioned earlier, society places a lot of pressure on fathers to provide the sole support for their partner’s during labor. But many fathers would prefer to just experience the moment with their wives, without the pressure to perform.
A doula can provide full support for the mother, allowing the father to take a back-seat from active support, and give him the chance to experience the birth along side her.
Before the birth, it’s important that the doula, mother, and father all sit together and talk about how they envision the childbirth. It’s also important that the father participate in choosing and hiring the doula, since they should both feel comfortable with whomever they choose to attend this special moment in their lives.
WHATZADOULA!
What is a Doula?
Birth Doula
Women have complex needs during childbirth. In addition to the safety of modern obstetrical care, and the love and companionship provided by their partners, women need consistent, continuous reassurance, comfort, encouragement and respect. They need individualized care based on their circumstances and preferences. The role of the birth doula encompasses the non-clinical aspects of care during childbirth.
The doula’s role is to provide physical and emotional support and assistance in gathering information for women and their partners during labor and birth. The doula offers help and advice on comfort measures such as breathing, relaxation, movement and positioning. She also assists the woman and her partner to become informed about the course of their labor and their options. Perhaps the most crucial role of the doula is providing continuous emotional reassurance and comfort.
Postpartum Doula
Postpartum Doulas are trained in postpartum adjustment, new born characteristics, care feeding and development and promotion of parent-infant bonding. They are experienced in supporting families through their postpartum experience. Coming into the home during the fourth trimester (12 weeks following birth). The doula’s role is to provide education, non-judgmental support and companionship; and to assist with newborn care and family adjustment and household organization (including meal preparation, laundry and other light household tasks). Postpartum doulas offer evidence-based information on infant feeding, emotional and physical recovery from birth, infant soothing and coping skills new parents and can make appropriate referrals and suggestions when necessary.
The Doula’s goal is to facilitate the transition to parenthood by supplying reliable and factual information, reassurance and hands-on support with children and household organization. The non-medical support of a doula meets the practical and psycho-social needs of the family and allows doula’s to make referrals to quality care providers such as lactation consultants, pediatricians, counselors and support groups when appropriate.
Excerpted and adapted from DONA International Position Papers. www.dona.org
Birth Doula
Women have complex needs during childbirth. In addition to the safety of modern obstetrical care, and the love and companionship provided by their partners, women need consistent, continuous reassurance, comfort, encouragement and respect. They need individualized care based on their circumstances and preferences. The role of the birth doula encompasses the non-clinical aspects of care during childbirth.
The doula’s role is to provide physical and emotional support and assistance in gathering information for women and their partners during labor and birth. The doula offers help and advice on comfort measures such as breathing, relaxation, movement and positioning. She also assists the woman and her partner to become informed about the course of their labor and their options. Perhaps the most crucial role of the doula is providing continuous emotional reassurance and comfort.
Postpartum Doula
Postpartum Doulas are trained in postpartum adjustment, new born characteristics, care feeding and development and promotion of parent-infant bonding. They are experienced in supporting families through their postpartum experience. Coming into the home during the fourth trimester (12 weeks following birth). The doula’s role is to provide education, non-judgmental support and companionship; and to assist with newborn care and family adjustment and household organization (including meal preparation, laundry and other light household tasks). Postpartum doulas offer evidence-based information on infant feeding, emotional and physical recovery from birth, infant soothing and coping skills new parents and can make appropriate referrals and suggestions when necessary.
The Doula’s goal is to facilitate the transition to parenthood by supplying reliable and factual information, reassurance and hands-on support with children and household organization. The non-medical support of a doula meets the practical and psycho-social needs of the family and allows doula’s to make referrals to quality care providers such as lactation consultants, pediatricians, counselors and support groups when appropriate.
Excerpted and adapted from DONA International Position Papers. www.dona.org
FAQ's
What does the word doula mean? The word “doula” comes from the ancient Greek, meaning “Woman’s servant.”
What effect does a doula have on birth outcomes? Tends to… result in shorter labors and fewer complications, reduce negative feelings about childbirth experience, and reduce need for labor inducing drugs, forceps or vacuum extraction. Reduces requests for pain medication, epidurals and the incidence of cesarean sections.
What effect does a doula have on mother? Women reported greater satisfaction with their birth experience, more positive assessments of their babies, fewer cesareans and medical interventions, and less postpartum depression.
What effect does a doula have on baby? Studies have shown that babies born with doulas present have shorter hospital stays with fewer admissions to special care nurseries, breastfeed more easily and have more affectionate mothers in postpartum period.
Does a doula replace medical staff? NO. A doula does not replace the nurses or other medical staff. Doulas do not perform clinical tasks such as blood pressure or temperature, monitoring fetal heart rate, doing vaginal exams or provide postpartum care. They are there to comfort and support the mother and to enhance communication between the mother, her support team and the medical professionals.
Will a doula make decisions on my behalf? No, a doula will not make decisions for clients or intervene with clinical care. She provides informational and emotional support, while respecting the families’ decisions.
Will a doula make my partner feel unnecessary? No, a doula is there to support both the mother and her partner and plays a crucial role in helping the partner become involved in the birth and newborn care to the extent he/she feels comfortable.
What is the difference between a birth and postpartum doula? A birth doula is a woman trained in childbirth who provides physical and emotional support during labor birth and the immediate postpartum period. A postpartum doula is a woman trained to care for the new family in the first weeks after birth providing household help, advice with newborn care, infant feeding and emotional support.
What are the benefits of having a postpartum doula? Some of the benefits include: increased success with breastfeeding, less chance of postpartum depression, less maternal exhaustion and frustration, greater understanding of newborn emotional, physical needs and behaviors.
Is it possible to have a non-medicated birth in a hospital? Absolutely, your body is designed to give birth. While there are many medical advances in the area of pain control there are also many options for non-medicated pain control. Most hospitals and physicians are quite respectful of your wishes as long as there are no complications that could endanger you or your baby. If you have any questions as to what your hospital or physician will allow; call them and ask.
What if I am considering pain medications? A doula is there to support the laboring woman with any decisions she makes and to help ensure a safe and satisfying birth as she defines it. She still needs continuous support even with pain medications. The doula can give dad/partner a break to go get something to eat or to take a nap if it's been a particularly long labor. She can take pictures, get ice-chips, do hand massage or just sit quietly while the woman rests.
Are most doulas licensed? At this time no license is available. There are a couple of nationally recognized organizations that offer certifications. Doulas of North America www.dona.org and Childbirth and Postpartum Professional Association www.cappa.net. Some doulas choose not to certify, I am currently working towards certification with DONA.
What does a doula cost? Cost varies from area to area and doula to doula. It is usually based on experience and the market. I am willing to barter, set up a sliding scale, and a payment plan. Do not allow money to keep you from looking into doula service.
When will I see a doula I have hired? You will see me at least twice for prenatal visits. As soon as labor begins I will meet you at your home and we will determine if it is time to transition to the hospital. I will stay with you through labor, delivery and up to two hours after the birth. You will see me again once in the hospital and for a minimum of 6 hours postpartum once you have gone home.
Are there any books that I should read? One of the most important parts of a successful birth and postpartum experience is being educated on what is happening to your body, your life and your baby. I suggest the following books:
Birthing From Within by Pam England
The Birth Partner by Penny Simkin
Ina May’s Guide to Child Birth by Ina May Gaskins
Mind Over Labor by Carl Jones, Marian Thomson, & emit Miller
Pregnancy, Childbirth and the Newborn by Simkin, Whalley and Keppler
The Baby Book by Drs. William and Martha Sears
The Breastfeeding Book by Drs. William and Martha Sears
Your Amazing Newborn by Klaus and Klaus
The Ultimate Breastfeeding Book of Answers by Dr. Jack Newman
What effect does a doula have on birth outcomes? Tends to… result in shorter labors and fewer complications, reduce negative feelings about childbirth experience, and reduce need for labor inducing drugs, forceps or vacuum extraction. Reduces requests for pain medication, epidurals and the incidence of cesarean sections.
What effect does a doula have on mother? Women reported greater satisfaction with their birth experience, more positive assessments of their babies, fewer cesareans and medical interventions, and less postpartum depression.
What effect does a doula have on baby? Studies have shown that babies born with doulas present have shorter hospital stays with fewer admissions to special care nurseries, breastfeed more easily and have more affectionate mothers in postpartum period.
Does a doula replace medical staff? NO. A doula does not replace the nurses or other medical staff. Doulas do not perform clinical tasks such as blood pressure or temperature, monitoring fetal heart rate, doing vaginal exams or provide postpartum care. They are there to comfort and support the mother and to enhance communication between the mother, her support team and the medical professionals.
Will a doula make decisions on my behalf? No, a doula will not make decisions for clients or intervene with clinical care. She provides informational and emotional support, while respecting the families’ decisions.
Will a doula make my partner feel unnecessary? No, a doula is there to support both the mother and her partner and plays a crucial role in helping the partner become involved in the birth and newborn care to the extent he/she feels comfortable.
What is the difference between a birth and postpartum doula? A birth doula is a woman trained in childbirth who provides physical and emotional support during labor birth and the immediate postpartum period. A postpartum doula is a woman trained to care for the new family in the first weeks after birth providing household help, advice with newborn care, infant feeding and emotional support.
What are the benefits of having a postpartum doula? Some of the benefits include: increased success with breastfeeding, less chance of postpartum depression, less maternal exhaustion and frustration, greater understanding of newborn emotional, physical needs and behaviors.
Is it possible to have a non-medicated birth in a hospital? Absolutely, your body is designed to give birth. While there are many medical advances in the area of pain control there are also many options for non-medicated pain control. Most hospitals and physicians are quite respectful of your wishes as long as there are no complications that could endanger you or your baby. If you have any questions as to what your hospital or physician will allow; call them and ask.
What if I am considering pain medications? A doula is there to support the laboring woman with any decisions she makes and to help ensure a safe and satisfying birth as she defines it. She still needs continuous support even with pain medications. The doula can give dad/partner a break to go get something to eat or to take a nap if it's been a particularly long labor. She can take pictures, get ice-chips, do hand massage or just sit quietly while the woman rests.
Are most doulas licensed? At this time no license is available. There are a couple of nationally recognized organizations that offer certifications. Doulas of North America www.dona.org and Childbirth and Postpartum Professional Association www.cappa.net. Some doulas choose not to certify, I am currently working towards certification with DONA.
What does a doula cost? Cost varies from area to area and doula to doula. It is usually based on experience and the market. I am willing to barter, set up a sliding scale, and a payment plan. Do not allow money to keep you from looking into doula service.
When will I see a doula I have hired? You will see me at least twice for prenatal visits. As soon as labor begins I will meet you at your home and we will determine if it is time to transition to the hospital. I will stay with you through labor, delivery and up to two hours after the birth. You will see me again once in the hospital and for a minimum of 6 hours postpartum once you have gone home.
Are there any books that I should read? One of the most important parts of a successful birth and postpartum experience is being educated on what is happening to your body, your life and your baby. I suggest the following books:
Birthing From Within by Pam England
The Birth Partner by Penny Simkin
Ina May’s Guide to Child Birth by Ina May Gaskins
Mind Over Labor by Carl Jones, Marian Thomson, & emit Miller
Pregnancy, Childbirth and the Newborn by Simkin, Whalley and Keppler
The Baby Book by Drs. William and Martha Sears
The Breastfeeding Book by Drs. William and Martha Sears
Your Amazing Newborn by Klaus and Klaus
The Ultimate Breastfeeding Book of Answers by Dr. Jack Newman
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
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